I find an increased intake for counseling leading up to holiday seasons such as summer vacation, Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter. This relates primarily to the added stresses of those season, mainly related to angst over meeting relatives or having to spend more time with a spouse.

Stress comes when a situation goes beyond normal abilities to cope. I describe a few response options to short term and long term stress.

With You In Mind,
Norm

Kids absorb the stress within family relationships. In this video, relationship expert Norm Quantz briefly touches on 3 principles that parents can live by to help DEstress their children. Consistency, even though it is not perfect, can keep children from the anxiety of constantly preparing themselves for the inconsistencies lived and taught by conflicted parents.

Clarity is the goal of communicating and very important with kids since they are not the ones best suited or most responsible for understanding an issue. Concern is the empathic attention that parents give to their children as parents and adults act in their best interest. These three components that create a healthier emotional and mental atmosphere are important for DEstressing children.

In this video I talk about the victim mindset and particularly focus on the double mindedness of victims who refuse to live as victims but are still being victimized.

This is common among people in the process of learning to come out of their victim situations, and out of their survivor instincts, insisting that they are no longer living as victims, not realizing that they are not free from victimization yet.

In his book, “When the Body says NO” Dr Gabor Mate talks about people who live this way, putting everyone and their needs before their own. He writes about how this kind of stress can cause serious immune system weaknesses and how these people are at risk for major chronic illness.

There is a huge internal angst when a person lives as a victim of another or others. Have a look at this video as we take a look at victim mentality and its effects on people and how it is possible to live a new way of life.

With You in Mind,
Norm Quantz

There are many benefits to accessing a therapist online, but today the question is this; is online therapy for depression as effective as in person, face to face therapy?”

There are numerous types of online therapy and in this video I am addressing the type of online counseling that I do, which is video therapy. I meet with many clients in my online conference room which replicates the in person experience without the travel time and expense.

There are some unique aspects to depression which make online counseling therapy a good option for many people. My clients have found that online therapy can actually enhance the therapy experience. As a therapist, I also see some very positive results counseling online with those who have issues with depression. Have a look at this video as I talk about some of those aspects from my perspective and from theirs.

Please feel free to comment and express your thoughts or to post your questions about online counseling.

With You in Mind
Norm Quantz

Note: If you are looking for an Online Counseling Therapist, Norm uses a video conference room, fully equipped with whiteboard and drawing capabilities, text, document sharing, video and audio. Please contact Norm through the contact form here or through his counseling website at Relationship-Makeover.

The assistance and friendship we received from family and friends both during and since our recent emergency with the hail storm has reminded me of how important it is to have good friends who support us when things get crazy. It also reminded me that not all friends or family are supportive.

There are two distinct kinds of friends. Some drain our energy and some fuel it up. In this video I talk about both types of friendships. Have a look at the video and as always I welcome comments.

With You in Mind,
Norm Quantz

In previous videos, I’ve been talking about coping methods and moving from coping to conquering. In this video I talk about anxiety as a coping method. When it becomes evident that something is going on, but often times it isn’t obvious enough for a person to know what it is.

Anxiety can show itself outwardly in reactions, physical activity, agitation, barking back, and other times it is very inward and personal, a private world within, while appearing on the outside as calm, happy and bubbly.

How do you move from coping by using anxiety, to conquering? Take a look at this video as I go deeper into the issue of coping via anxiety. I often find that anxiety is a reaction to some manipulation or pressure the person feels. It is a way that they are counteracting not being valued. Anxiety is often the reactive coping method that they are using to handle the stresses that are coming their way.

I’m interested in your comments, questions and feedback.

With You in Mind,
Norm