Have you been trying to grab the attention of your spouse to the troubles in your marriage relationship? Is it going nowhere and you are at your wits end? It has been amazing to me as a counseling therapist how powerful separation is to gain the attention of a reluctant spouse to the seriousness of the matters that tear away at the marriage harmony. It seems that when separation takes place, often a switch goes off in the partner’s head that awakens their sense of urgency, draws them out of complacency, and starts them on the road of personal investigation into the marriage problems. I mention in this video that often the reason for this is about how much it is known outside the family that the marriage is in trouble. As long as it can be kept “in-house”, the urgency isn’t there. Once it affects the spouse’s outside relationships, then it is given a higher priority.
I caution those considering separation if there is risk of physical harm, to have a well laid plan before leaving. Also, it is not a matter to take lightly as an attention getter. Be serious about it or the results may complicate any future attempt to separate.
This may be your time to raise the level of concern to the place separation may be the best option. If your spouse refuses to get the help needed to turn the marriage relationship around towards healthy and seems to only pay lip service to any move to change, this may be your time to consider separation. What is your situation like? The Power of Separation can be used for good but make sure this is well thought out or it can backfire on you. It is important for you to get advice on these matters from those who understand the risk.
With You in Mind,
Norm
